Monsoon Smiles

Madison testing out her hand-me-down umbrella

she is loving this weather

she decided to play in the rain, without her umbrella

she told me she was shaking off - "like a wet dog" :)

she is having so much fun - we should really consider moving somewhere it rains a little more

more shaking off

i love these smile; pure, simple, happiness

Getting Ready

J and I had been promising Madison that we would start back to school shopping soon. Soon ended up being Saturday, we took her to the mall, and Sunday to Target. Here are a few of my favorite finds...

This is a start to Madison's stuff. She had a blast trying on clothes, modeling for daddy, and hearing Daddy tell her how beautiful she is. She took 20 minutes picking out the lunch box, it was such a hard choice. Backpack shopping is going to be so much fun - really, i love it.

  

these are from Target, so cute.

another Target find, Madison was ok with these because they have a "heel". can you see the sole of the shoe is a little tiny bit bigger in the back. ; )

last Target shoe find, Madison has the Sketchers twinkle toes and loved that Target had there own version

 

these are from Justice, I love them

This outfit (Justice) looks so cute on Madison.

And this one (Justice) makes her look so grown up, but also very cute.

These are Austin's - he didn't want to go shopping so he is stuck with what I pick, and oh my gosh he looks so handsome in these. He will need several more pair of jeans but i needed to make sure I was getting the right size, and shoes

and these are Zac's - he wasn't with us either and unfortunatly these jean have already had to be handed over to Austin (way too short). Zac may not have a choice but to come shopping once just to get jeans.

So that was round one. Not too bad, it's a good start. I remember loving "back to school" shopping with my mom and dad when I was a kid, it must be a girl thing, the boys have no interest. I'm glad I have Madison enjoying it with as a parent.

Happy Memorial Day

Thank you to all the men and women that have served, are serving, or will be serving our country. You are forever in our thoughts and prayers.

toothless

Madison lost her second tooth

Thursday May 27

Right before dinner

Which was hamburgers and hotdogs, and corn on the cob – her favorite.

Tough to eat when one is toothless

But she made it work.

And thanks to my Kodak Play we can all squirm thru, I mean watch J extracting said tooth. GAG!!! Enjoy…

Terrified

I started this post, mentally last year, actually writing it May 28, months before school starts. Sitting at my desk at work with tears streaming down my cheeks.

I’ll start with saying that I do have an older (handsome, smart, funny…) son that is already in school, Jr. High; yes he survived, and yes he is happy. I understand the logic. But that does not make this any easier. I am terrified of the idea that Madison will be starting school this year.

I have thousands of reason. Some sane and lots of insane mommy reason - like, she just needs me (or maybe it’s I just need her). I don’t want her to be scared or frustrated or hurt or sad or… I think you get it. I think she got a pretty crappy start in this world and deserves nothing but happiness now and forever (remember I said insane mommy reasoning).

I know she will love being in school. She wants nothing more then to make lots of friends. She will be happy (and maybe sad, scared, frustrated… and that she will be ok). I know she is waiting to soak everything in. I know all of this. I’m still terrified.

I didn’t want her to start out being labeled, you know the “sick kid”, or the “cancer kid” she has been cancer free for 3 ½ years. J and talked about not even saying anything to the school since she was released medically with no school restrictions. I agreed, until I went in the gymnasium during the tour of the school, and one of the gym walls is a rock wall. Yep, a 4-5 foot high rock wall. I spilled. She is labeled. She will have restriction placed by mom – no harness free rock wall climbing. Let me explain, the cancer is not my biggest concern anymore. My concern is the hole the cancer left in my daughter spinal cord (c1 – t2 for the medical types out there). This hole promised to put my daughter in a wheel chair twice, both of her tumor resections. This hole promised additional surgeries including removing 2 of my daughter’s ribs to fuse to the vertebrae to assist in holding her head up. This hole cause Madison’s neurosurgeon to be amazed every 6 months that she is still holding her head up on her own. So yes, this hole forces this mom take some extra precautions to make sure Madison is safe. I won’t be there to protect her.

I am scared that she will get hurt. I’m scared that she will have her feelings hurt. I’m scared that she will be scared.

Remember me?

Terrified.

WAR

Yesterday, there was a small war going on between Madison and the Boys. A war of the signs. It started with the boys closing the door, in Madison’s face, and not letting her in their room. So the brilliant mom that I am had Madison get a pen and piece of paper and her create this…



Translation, for those that do not speak/read Madison – NO BrOtHErS ALLOWEd. And a picture of mean scary mom, because, she told me, sometime I am mean. She felt better. Better, until she saw the Boys retaliation sign…

NO 5 YEAR OLDS ALLOWED IN DIS (yes it said dis) ROOM. She was crushed. She told me her day was ruined and that she had the meanest brothers in the whole world. I gave her lots hugs and kisses and tried to explain that her brothers must have thought her sign was cool to make one for their door. She was still crushed.

Maybe 15 minutes later, she has me follow her to look at “something”. I followed her back to her brothers’ closed do to find that she had crossed off the 5 on the Boys sign and fixed it with a 12 (the age of both Boys). She was so please with herself. She opened the door to let the boys know that they were not allowed in their room anymore, and walked away satisfied.

I had to go to work, but I heard the war is continuing while I am away. I couldn’t wait to get home and see the newest creations. I had been texted that Madison’s includes that she is 5 years old and that she is a princess, both completely true. I don’t know if the Boys are still tormenting Madison playing along or not.

Edit: I came home to several new signs. My favorite: REMEMBER I AM ONLY 5 YRS OLD. I say that to her brothers all the time.

Mother's Day

For Mother's Day this year J and the kids got me a Kodak Play Sport. I love it. I love the videos of the kids. I love that we can take it in the pool. I hoping this summer I will get videos of Madison learning to swim. I hoping Austin warms up to having videos made of him.

One of the best things have been Madison "sneaking" it to her room and make videos were no one is watching her. Her real thoughts. I love going thru the videos and find her singing, or talking about her day. J has warned me several times that if she drops it I won't be able to take it to the pool because it could break the seals. After finding this (posted below) video I told him it is worth the risk. She can "sneak" the camera when ever she wants.
I cried watching this one.

Family Pictures

Griffin Grand Kids

Happy Easter

I never got around to posting about Easter. At very least I want to post the pictures. So here goes...

Top - Austin, Luke, and Madison
Bottom - Keira, Cameron, and Kailey

My Beautiful nieces Keira and Kailey

Austin and Madison

My handsome nephews Cameron and Luke

Fancy girls - Kailey, Madison, and Keira

Me and my 2 awesome kids.

(one of)My beautiful sister(s) Angie and her adorable boys Luke and Cameron

Nothing says Easter like playing in the sandbox in beautiful dresses and cute Easter clothes.

Blowing bubbles, notice the nail polish matches her dress, we got lucky with that one.

Madison decided on a couple games to play with her cousins - this is "the egg and spoon race".

and this is after Austin won the race. She was a little disappointed.

She wasn't too happy with the Easter Egg Hunt either, one of her cousins beat her to one of the eggs.

Kailey

Keira - I wish I had taken a picture of the egg Keira painted, it was a beautiful purple/black swirl.

Madison coloring eggs.

My awesome son Austin; who thinks he is getting too old for the games and egg hunts, but stills plays along to for me. (he won the egg and spoon race - and gave his prize to his little cousin Kailey)

Madison - My baby is turning into such a beautiful little girl. I can't believe how fast she is growing up. Pictures like this make me want to hold on to her even tighter.

Pierced

Madison has been asking to get her ears pierced for about a year. After this last MRI we decided that it was time, and today was the day. She did great. She was a little hesitant at first; she said that she still wanted to get them done but that she was nervous. One of the girls that did the piercing explained to Madison that it would be really quick and that it would not hurt. Madison asked if she could sit in my lap. Once that was ok'd she was ready to go.

lining up the dots

my brave little one, I had to ask her to hold my hands, I think I was more nervous then she was

1, 2, 3,...

go.

She has earrings.

One Word Wednesday

Heroes