Tuesday, March 30, 2010

ups and downs

Last night Madison asked me if I remember my pictures (MRI) when I was a little girl like her. I told her I didn't have pictures like she does. So she asked about Austin's. I told her he didn't have them either. She doesn't understand why she has to have pictures.I really don't know how to explain it to her. I don't know how to explain why she has cancer when I don't understand it myself.

Madison did really well with the mask today

She was scared

She asked for a few more minutes before they put the mask over her face, several times (once for a quick kiss from me, that brought tears to several eyes)

She didn't want to lay and be held down, didn't want to sit a lap, she wanted to stand. Stand?

So I stood right beside her, as she stood and took little breaths thru the mask, waiting for her to collapse - hoping to catch her before she fell

No tears this time - at least none from Madison

The sedation was different - they gave her gas and a sleeping medication to help ease her awake

I asked to have her IV taken out before she woke up. one less thing for her to freak out about. she has had several MRI's with sedation and has always been ok

It took much longer for her to wake up this time, and when she did, she was sick

Pale and nauseous

We were release with a large bucket for the drive home (luckily it went unused)

When we got home Madison and I lay in my bed and slept the day away

Thankfully she woke up this afternoon feeling much better

J reviewed the scans and says they are clear. The official read is next week

I'm glad today is over, it sucks that Madison has to go through these

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